What was I thinking when I ate that...?
I'm not even sure why I mention this topic in this venue. But I've seen much more stupid posts on sillier topics by other people. I think I was prompted to write this partly due to the fact that my previous post alluded to Freud's anal stage of human psychological development, and, the temporary condition I find myself in this morning.
Admittedly so, Skip Hansen is a very "regular" guy. Not only am I "regular", meaning average looks, intelligence, and social stature...I am very "regular" in the regularity department. I do not have now, nor have ever had, a problem with "going" on a regular basis.
In the "afternoon" stage of one's life, one might expect to have digestive issues. As for me...not as yet. I have always been as "regular" as the 10:15 from Tulsa. Right on time...at least twice a day. I have known people who just can't "go", at least not without some sort of outside stimulation being introduced to their system. In fact, I knew someone a long time ago who didn't (or couldn't) go but once or twice a week! I believe her doctor made it clear that she needed to address this problem as it is not a healthy condition. For lack of better way of saying this, "Ya' gotta get that shit outta there! It ain't good for ya'!"
Like I said, I've never had much of a problem in this area, save for an occasional case of culinary bad judgement. Although I think nerves has been the cause in some instances. There is nothing like a good case of dysentery-like diarrhea to make you forget about what is making you nervous.
The strange thing is, I spent a good deal of time in the South Pacific when I was in my early-20s...my Navy tours. Vietnam, Philippines, Thailand, Taiwan...I was there. And I don't remember ever having any kind of digestive or stomach distress once. And I ate (and drank) crap in town, off base...in shit hole bars and restaurants I wouldn't even go in today. God knows what kinds of "bugs" were introduced to my system. Geeze, I even drank the water in town. And to top it off, that was in between flying 14 hour patrol flights to and from, in and around a combat zone...was I not nervous doing that? I never got sick when I was overseas.
I did, however, get very sick for several weeks while I was training in friggin' Millington, Tennesse. Millington (just outside Memphis) was home to a huge Naval airborne technical school. I was hurting for a while in that sewer of a place. But overseas? Nada!
I think it may have been partly due to the fact that the Navy pumps you full of antibiotics and other preventatives before you head over there. There is one lovely little injected cocktail called "GG", gammagobulin. They stick a huge syringe in each cheek...right out of the refrigerator I might add...and pump about a million cc's of this cold stuff into you. It feels like a couple of golf balls under your ass skin for about an hour to two. Maybe that humiliation helped stem the gastric distress tide.
Like I said, I do not have now, nor have ever had, a chronic digestive disorder. No spastic colon, no chronic gastritis, no irritable bowel syndrome. But in the past few years I do get what I like to call the What The Hell Was I Thinking When I Ate That Squirts? Or, the Pepperoni and Beer Syndrome.
I guess I really shouldn't complain since it doesn't happen every time I choose to abuse my system with pizza and beer...just once in a while. My poor wife Loretta can't even look at that stuff any more. In fact, if she even sees a picture of a green chile, she has to run to the bathroom!
So, at 5:00am, I got up and headed to the "library", several times. Now, at 7:00am, it's all good. I'm done. And the good thing about this morning's minor explosion? I found a really interesting recipe in Bon Appetit for Shrimp, Chicken, and Andouille Gumbo! I wonder how my system would welcome that concoction?
All in all, I think it was well worth the temporary discomfort I experienced...it usually is. I haven't eaten pepperoni pizza for months...and won't again for quite a while!
Admittedly so, Skip Hansen is a very "regular" guy. Not only am I "regular", meaning average looks, intelligence, and social stature...I am very "regular" in the regularity department. I do not have now, nor have ever had, a problem with "going" on a regular basis.
In the "afternoon" stage of one's life, one might expect to have digestive issues. As for me...not as yet. I have always been as "regular" as the 10:15 from Tulsa. Right on time...at least twice a day. I have known people who just can't "go", at least not without some sort of outside stimulation being introduced to their system. In fact, I knew someone a long time ago who didn't (or couldn't) go but once or twice a week! I believe her doctor made it clear that she needed to address this problem as it is not a healthy condition. For lack of better way of saying this, "Ya' gotta get that shit outta there! It ain't good for ya'!"
Like I said, I've never had much of a problem in this area, save for an occasional case of culinary bad judgement. Although I think nerves has been the cause in some instances. There is nothing like a good case of dysentery-like diarrhea to make you forget about what is making you nervous.
The strange thing is, I spent a good deal of time in the South Pacific when I was in my early-20s...my Navy tours. Vietnam, Philippines, Thailand, Taiwan...I was there. And I don't remember ever having any kind of digestive or stomach distress once. And I ate (and drank) crap in town, off base...in shit hole bars and restaurants I wouldn't even go in today. God knows what kinds of "bugs" were introduced to my system. Geeze, I even drank the water in town. And to top it off, that was in between flying 14 hour patrol flights to and from, in and around a combat zone...was I not nervous doing that? I never got sick when I was overseas.
I did, however, get very sick for several weeks while I was training in friggin' Millington, Tennesse. Millington (just outside Memphis) was home to a huge Naval airborne technical school. I was hurting for a while in that sewer of a place. But overseas? Nada!
I think it may have been partly due to the fact that the Navy pumps you full of antibiotics and other preventatives before you head over there. There is one lovely little injected cocktail called "GG", gammagobulin. They stick a huge syringe in each cheek...right out of the refrigerator I might add...and pump about a million cc's of this cold stuff into you. It feels like a couple of golf balls under your ass skin for about an hour to two. Maybe that humiliation helped stem the gastric distress tide.
Like I said, I do not have now, nor have ever had, a chronic digestive disorder. No spastic colon, no chronic gastritis, no irritable bowel syndrome. But in the past few years I do get what I like to call the What The Hell Was I Thinking When I Ate That Squirts? Or, the Pepperoni and Beer Syndrome.
I guess I really shouldn't complain since it doesn't happen every time I choose to abuse my system with pizza and beer...just once in a while. My poor wife Loretta can't even look at that stuff any more. In fact, if she even sees a picture of a green chile, she has to run to the bathroom!
So, at 5:00am, I got up and headed to the "library", several times. Now, at 7:00am, it's all good. I'm done. And the good thing about this morning's minor explosion? I found a really interesting recipe in Bon Appetit for Shrimp, Chicken, and Andouille Gumbo! I wonder how my system would welcome that concoction?
All in all, I think it was well worth the temporary discomfort I experienced...it usually is. I haven't eaten pepperoni pizza for months...and won't again for quite a while!
posted by James | 6:59 AM
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